Typing without really thinking… hope it makes sense.

This is weird. I’m not used to this. It’s foreign. There’s really nothing wrong… Every now and then, like once or twice a day, I’ll still have a flashback or body memory that will make me cry for a minute. But that is it. My mood isn’t horrible. The demons are there, but not awful.Continue reading “Typing without really thinking… hope it makes sense.”

Recent Events…

I ended up in the psychiatric hospital again, on the 12th of December. I want to post about it, but I don’t want to start crying… mostly because I’m in public right now… I knew if I tried to write this blog at home, it would never get done. I’ve been trying to write itContinue reading “Recent Events…”

I don’t even know where to start…

I haven’t posted in a really long time, and I apologize. There is a reason, and I’m going to do my best to fill you in. I hope I can get the whole thing out. My stalker had come back. Mostly, he just followed me, but he did approach me once while I was sittingContinue reading “I don’t even know where to start…”

Please let this not be real…

I don’t want this to be real. I can’t really go into detail. Except that I took a Thorazine, and now I am waiting to see if it is real or not. The Thorazine always works, if it is psychosis, paranoia or hallucinations, so I have no doubt that if that is the case thisContinue reading “Please let this not be real…”

Well, it’s the middle of the night…

… and I’ll give you three guesses. Number One – I can’t sleep. Well done! Number Two – I want to self-harm. You’re two for two… Number Three – I’m sitting on my front porch, writing again. Got ’em all!!! I’m not sure if writing is really going to prevent me from hurting myself, butContinue reading “Well, it’s the middle of the night…”

Found Here   I apologize for not writing sooner. The partial hospitalization program and school, together, have been kicking my butt. Those, plus other appointments getting squeezed in as best I can, I’ve barely had time to sleep, it seems. I want to write at least a couple times a week and I’ve been seriouslyContinue reading

And to top it all off…

I’ve been having some sharp pain in my shoulder for a while now. I had a few shots into the joint, but they didn’t last very long at all. The last shot I got lasted all of two days. I called the doctor’s office, and the nurse practitioner that I see regularly decided to sendContinue reading “And to top it all off…”

Loud Inside my Head

Found Here It is really loud to me right now. The demons are coming at me full force. Probably from lack of sleep. I didn’t sleep last night at all and only got a 5-hour nap in during the day. They tend to get louder when I’m really tired or really stressed. What’s the mostContinue reading “Loud Inside my Head”

Going Catatonic and Other Recent Events

According to the DSM-5, at┬áleast three out of twelve symptoms must be present for a diagnosis of catatonia. These symptoms include: Stupor (oblivious inability to move or respond to stimuli),┬ácatalepsy (rigid body posture) Mutism (little to no verbal communication) Waxy flexibility (body remains in whatever position it is placed by another) Negativism (lack of verbalContinue reading “Going Catatonic and Other Recent Events”